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Dictionaries can be dangerous

From the Hydraulic Press Channel on YouTube:



Slowed speech

This is pretty funny. Rob Beschizza, "Trump slowed 50%", BoingBoing 4/19/2016: Everyone sounds drunk or stoned when slowed down 50%, but doing so to Trump reveals that his bizarre, digressive speech patterns are uncannily like a drunk sped up 200%. So it seems appropriate to try the same trick on some other politicians. Here's Bernie […]




Near the Star Ferry terminal on the Hong Kong Island side, Bea Lam noticed a number of fantastic, huge, colorful posters plastered on the walls as part of a “LipsyncHK” project that showcases Cantonese phrases and encourages visitors to try them out.  Bea was (very happily) surprised to see this large and open demonstration of […]



Papi Jiang: PRC internet sensation

Tom Mazanec wrote in to call Papi醬 (jiàng means "thick sauce; jam-like or paste-like food") to my attention.  Tom explains: She's a big internet phenomenon in mainland China who's now in the news (BBC report, Shanghaiist post) because many of her videos were blocked from Youku and Weixin for too much swearing. A few cynics […]



Cactus Wawa revisited

One of the most intriguing and enthralling Language Log posts is this one: "cactus wawa: the strange tale of a strange character" (11/1/14) I spent months doing the research for that post and, although it garnered 80 helpful comments, I still felt that there were some loose ends.  Consequently, I was delighted to receive last […]



World Wide Words

World Wide Words: Updates

Why should hiding quietly be called 'lying doggo'?



New online: Lie Doggo

'Fewmet' is an ancient British hunting term, now often associated with dragons.



New online: Fewmet

Why are ornamental type characters called 'dingbats'?



New online: Dingbat



The Onion

Man On Rolling Swivel Chair Pushes Away From Desk Like Blue Angel Breaking Formation

PHILADELPHIA—Thrusting backward on his chair’s casters while banking sharply to the left as if he were pulling hard on the control stick of an F/A-18C Hornet, local billing associate Erik Brison reportedly pushed away from his desk Tuesday like a Blue Angel breaking formation. Witnesses confirmed that after completing the initial high-speed maneuver, Brison continued on a straight heading, gliding swiftly across the office’s modular carpet tiles to reach for a padded mailing envelope like a member of the Angels’ demonstration squadron seamlessly transitioning into a low-altitude knife-edge pass. Mirroring the poise of his elite Navy and Marine counterparts who regularly endure upwards of nine G’s, the office worker is said to have maintained a calm, steady demeanor even as his body was subjected to the harsh forces of piloting his reclining swivel chair over an extension cord. At press time, sources reported that Brison ...



Study: Music Improves Babies’ Speech

A recent study found that babies who attended music lessons displayed more brain activity and language capability than those who didn’t, suggesting the rhythms of music can aid in the detection of speech patterns. What do you think?



Upcoming Changes To U.S. Currency

Secretary of the Treasury Jack Lew recently announced a series of significant changes to U.S. currency. Here are some of the more notable alterations on the horizon:

  • $50 bill to feature blinking Ulysses S. Grant
  • Portentous images of the attacks on the World Trade Center hidden on the $20 bill to be hidden more carefully this time
  • Word “Dollars” officially changed to “Smackeroos” on all bills
  • New flavors include Radical Ranch, Sweet Heat, and Baja Burst
  • Approval to produce a $2.07 bill in keeping with inflation of bodega pizza slice
  • $5 bills way easier to counterfeit
  • One more attempt to shove a dollar coin down our throats
  • Current level of U.S. national debt revealed when bills held under ultraviolet light



Follow Me If You Want To See The Real Knott’s Berry Farm

Hey, how you doing? Having a good time? Real fun here at Knott’s Berry Farm, isn’t it? All the great rides and attractions and everything? When you look around, it’s just like it says on the sign—“California’s Best Theme Park”—right? Well, I’m here to give you the real scoop, pal: The crap they’ve been feeding you in that little pamphlet you got at the ticket kiosk doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface. Not even close. That’s the mass-market version for all the stupid sheep who don’t know any better. If you want to see the real Knott’s Berry Farm—I’m talking about the shit that’s not on any map—just play it cool and follow me.

I’ll show you a side of Knott’s Berry Farm that will make your goddamn head spin.

All ...



Your Horoscopes — Week Of April 26, 2016



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